Radical Discovery. We may only have to be average after all!

Oh what fun I had test driving cars last weekend! Nothing whatsoever to do with the cars, it was the on-tap entertainment in the car showroom that provided the hilarity.

We had an appointment, for which the salesman kept us waiting while he chatted with his colleagues. No matter, we occupied ourselves pressing buttons and sniffing leather.

Finally we were shown to his desk. His mini-empire within an empire.

“Be with you in a minute. Couple of urgent calls. Hello Mrs Garrity, it’s Simon from the car dealership. Did I do something wrong yesterday?”

Judging by the long silence that followed, I’m guessing the answer to that was yes.

“Well I’m sorry you feel that way, I didn’t mean to offend you. If you still want to bring your son’s double bass down to see if it fits, knock yourself out.”

Big sigh and raise of eyebrows in our direction.

“Well if that’s the way you feel I can’t help you.”

Next call.

“Hello, Mr Baintree. You called about arranging a test drive. Well the thing is, we work every other weekend, so don’t come next weekend, come the weekend after.”

Whaaaaaaat? We are by now scanning for cameras and the sniggering members of our family hiding in the wings. Where are Ant & Dec? Noel Edmunds, is that you in a really bad wig & outrageous beard? (no disguise there really). But no, this was REAL.

We were also treated to a run down of all the salesmans’ nicknames in the showroom from Noddy to Gromit, complete with impressions for each.

Is customer service really that bad out there? Are businesses managing to survive with this level of numpty-ness at the sharp end? If so, what are we bothered about? We only have to do the basics and we’re super heroes.

Can’t wait for this weekend. I am going to be prepared this time. Keep an eye out on Youtube and watch out car-sales people. If you have 2 laughing hyenas in your midst you may just appear on “You’ve been blogged” next week!